Relationships are simple. We want to feel understood and special.  We want to feel known.  Relationships break down when one person stops listening, stops noticing, or stops thinking. One key to a happy relationship is being perceptive  Has your partner ever said, "I feel like you don't care" or "You're not paying attention to me"?   If you do care then you should hear these phrases as a call to action.  Open your eyes. Study the little things.  This takes effort, but remember, your relationship is a long term investment.  The ROI is incalculable.   Here are ways to get started.

1. What makes them laugh the most?

2. What time of day do they feel most awake/alive?

3. How many hours of sleep do they prefer?

4. What is their favorite breakfast food, lunch food and dinner food?

5. What do they like to do after a long work week?

6. What makes them feel better after a bad day?

7. Do they like it better when I call or text?

8. What is the first thing they like to do when they get home from work?

9. How long would they like to have to get ready?

10. Are they annoyed by lateness?

11. Are they quiet or do they vocalize it when they're upset?

12. Do they like soft pillows or more firm pillows?

13. Do they like ice or no ice?

14. Do they like a straw or no straw?

15. What condiments do they use on their burgers and hot dogs?

16. What makes them cry?

17. Would they rather be too hot or too cold?

18. What are they allergic to?

19. What time of day are they most talkative?

20. Do they sleep with heavy blankets or light blankets?

21. What spots on their neck/back/shoulders do they get the most tension?

22. Do they recycle religiously or not?

23. What are they most insecure about?

24.  How much alone time do they prefer?

25. Do they enjoy large social gatherings or feel obligated to attend?

26. What are 3 things they can't leave home without?

27. What makes them the most stressed out? What are 3 things they can't leave home without?

28. What patterns can you detect in their general mood?

29. What family member are they closest to?

30. Who is their best friend?

31. How is their pain tolerance level?

32.  What are their shoes/clothing sizes?

33. What is their favorite scent?

34.  Do they like black socks or white socks?

35. Do they prefer to dress up or dress down?

36. What is their Starbucks drink of choice?

37. What is their alcoholic drink of choice?

38. Do they enjoy public speaking or not?

39.  What movie do they like to watch over and over again?

40. What picture of the two of you is their favorite?

41. What side of you do they prefer to be on in pictures?

42. How do they act when they are hungry?

43. How do they act when they are tired?

44. Do they tend to avoid conflict or start conflict?

45. What outfit do they wear the most?

46. How often do they wash their hair?

47. What do they complain about most?  Work? Family? Their appearance? Finances?

48. Do they like to celebrate small wins? How?

49. What helps them get through failure?

50. Would they rather talk about the future or live in the day-to-day?

51. Which parent are they closer to?

52. What name do they like to be called best?

53. What distracts them most easily?

54. What's their movie watching style?  Constant commentary or total silence?

55. Are they a stressed traveler or a relaxed traveler?

56. What food do they crave most often?

57. How comfortable are they meeting new people?

58. When do they feel the most self-conscious?

59. Would they rather go shopping by themselves or with you?

60. What song makes them want to dance?