Parents and in-laws! Part two of the book "1001 Questions to Ask Before You Get Married" covers parents and in-laws, and I wanted to pull together the most helpful questions to ask each other as you navigate these waters.  Remember that it's impossible to be all things to all people.  "Diplomacy, resiliency, and unity as a couple are a must... Always treat your in-laws with the same love and respect you show your spouse." - Monica Leahy.  If you're not married or engaged then replace "in-laws" with "partner's parents".  

Section 1: Your Parents

1.  Do your parents approve or disapprove of your partner?
2. If your parents don't approve of your partner, how will it affect your marriage?
3. What would you do if your parents intentionally or unintentionally criticize or offend your partner?
4. Do your parents have a strong opinion on how you should live your married life?
5. In general, whose advice would you most likely take, your partner's or your parents'?
6. With which family members, if any, do you plan on spending the various holidays?
7. Does your partner feel you're too attached to your parents?
8. Would you agree to have an aged or ill parent move in with you?
9. If you and your partner have a disagreement, will you seek solace in your parents?

Section 2: Your In-Laws

1. Do you feel your in-laws approve of you as a partner?  Whether they do or not, how does that make you feel?
2. If you were having problems with your in-laws, would you speak to them directly without consulting your partner?
3. Should your partner be in charge of resolving problems you may have with your in laws?
4. If your in-laws offend you (intentionally or unintentionally) would you speak up immediately or expect your partner to defend you on the spot?
5. How do you feel about spending holidays with your in-laws instead of your parents?
6. How important to you is it to please your in-laws?
7. Do you feel pressure to dress, talk, or behave differently about your in-laws?
8. Do you feel your parents treat your partner better than your in-laws treat you?  If so, how?
9. What positive contributions, if any, have your in-laws made to your relationship with your partner?  What about negative contributions? 

Section 3: Are we our parents?

1. How do you resemble your mom, physically, emotionally, or in your actions?
2. How do you resemble your dad, physically, emotionally, or in your actions?

3. How do you resemble your mother-in-law, physically, emotionally, or in your actions?

4. How do you resemble your father-in-law, physically, emotionally, or in your actions?

5. How does your partner resemble their mother, physically, emotionally, or in their actions?

6. How does your partner resemble their father, physically, emotionally, or in their actions?

7. How does your partner resemble your mother, physically, emotionally, or in their actions?

8. How does your partner resemble your father, physically, emotionally, or in their actions?

Section 4: Spending Time

Hope you enjoyed these questions!

Love,

Dylan